


The Pillow Book

by samsarapine



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Blanket Permission, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-14
Updated: 2010-03-14
Packaged: 2017-10-07 23:45:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/70492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samsarapine/pseuds/samsarapine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gojyo finds Hakkai's private sex fantasy journal, and he's got a bone to pick with the author.  Several bones, as it turns out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Pillow Book

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whymzycal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whymzycal/gifts).



  
  
  
**Entry tags:** |   
[fic](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/fic), [gojyo](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/gojyo), [hakkai/gojyo](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/hakkai/gojyo), [romance](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/romance), [saiyuki](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/saiyuki), [yuletide_smut](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/yuletide_smut)  
  
---|---  
  
_**Fic: "The Pillow Book", Gojyo/Hakkai, NC-17**_  
**Title:** The Pillow Book  
**Author:** [](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/profile)[**samsarapine**](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/)  
**Rating:** NC-17  
**Pairing(s):** Gojyo/Hakkai  
**Disclaimer:** Saiyuki characters are the property of Kazuya Minekura. I make no profit from this story.   
**Summary:** Gojyo finds Hakkai's private sex fantasy journal, and he's got a bone to pick with the author. Several bones, as it turns out.  
**Words:** About 9,700  
**Warnings:** Some het sex, some biting, rough youkai sex   
**A/N:** Written for [](http://whymzycal.livejournal.com/profile)[**whymzycal**](http://whymzycal.livejournal.com/) for the 2009 [](http://community.livejournal.com/yuletide_smut/profile)[**yuletide_smut**](http://community.livejournal.com/yuletide_smut/) fest. Whymz gave me a fantastic prompt – it was so much fun to write! And many, many thanks to my beta and friend, [](http://nanfoodle.livejournal.com/profile)[**nanfoodle**](http://nanfoodle.livejournal.com/), who put up with me saying, "I should be done this weekend. Well, maybe early next week. Er, can you read this right away, and btw, can you help me cut 4,000 words?" with patience and good cheer. ♥

 

**The Pillow Book**

 

Gojyo lay in the grass outside his old house in Chang'an, scratching his stomach idly as he watched the clouds drift. The day hinted of summer after a winter and spring that had been too wet and far too long. He still had a half-dozen projects on the list that Hakkai'd given him, but nothing important enough to keep him from slacking if he felt like it.

Shit. Something had to change. His old life in Chang'an stank like cat piss after the freedom of the last three years on the road. Everything was too quiet. Nothing new to do, nothing new to say. Even now, the sun-warmed air was so still that he could hear the small hiss of the gas feeding his lighter's flame as he lit a new cigarette. He dropped his head back on his arm and blew smoke at the sky.

It was like nothing fit any more, like his life was too small these days. A little action, that was what he needed, enough to make his heart pound again. He wasn't greedy, it didn't need to be entrails-level or anything. Just something exciting.

"Gojyo, I'm going to do the laundry. Please sweep the porch while I'm gone."

"Yeah."

"Gojyo—"

"I heard you. Sweep the porch. Got it." Damned porch. He never should have built the fucking thing, but he'd needed something to do and Hakkai had wanted it. Fuck it. He didn't move from his comfortable sprawl on the grass. The sweeping could wait.

Hakkai was clearly irritated, but he loaded Jeep with a couple of bags of laundry and drove away. No dust rose, as if the dirt road had been swept clean, too.

Gojyo finished his cigarette and crushed it out. The sun felt good, but it was making him sleepy and it was still too damned cold to be lying around on the ground if he wanted to nap. Making up the futon was too much work, though. He sighed and stared at the empty road.

Maybe Hakkai's bed. He'd be gone for a couple of hours at least, maybe longer if he decided to do the shopping. He might get pissy about the porch if Gojyo hadn't swept it by the time he got back, but he probably wouldn't mind too much if Gojyo stretched out for a kip on the bed instead of making up the futon.

He rolled to his feet, stretched, and headed inside. On the way to Hakkai's bedroom, he grabbed an ashtray. Hakkai might forgive him for sleeping in the bed, but he'd never forgive him if he dropped cigarette ash and butts on the bedroom floor.

Sinking onto the covers, Gojyo lit another fag and looked around. Like the rest of the house, the bedroom was dark, only one small window to allow a bit of dim light. Hakkai's clothing hung from pegs since Gojyo hadn't built a closet for him yet. A lamp on the nightstand, a book beside it. Nothing on the walls, no pictures, no mirrors, not even a corkboard like the one Hakkai had asked Gojyo to hang in the kitchen last month.

Gojyo tapped ash into the ashtray and thought of the way his futon in the living room looked every morning when he woke up, with its comfortable sprawl of clothing, blankets, empty beer cans, cigarette butts and dog-eared magazines, all silently whisked away while Gojyo drank his coffee, still half-asleep.

Yeah, Hakkai might get pissy about the nap, but not about the using-the-bed part of it. Gojyo toed off his shoes and crushed his cigarette out before he stripped and slipped between the sheets. The pillow smelled like Hakkai, but that was sort of nice. He sighed and slipped his hand underneath, getting comfortable.

His hand met parchment.

_What the fuck?_ He sat up and looked under the pillow. A small stack of paper lay underneath. _Letters?_

Wondering who could be writing to Hakkai, Gojyo picked up the pages. No, not letters; at least not letters to Hakkai, since it was Hakkai's writing. He let his eye wander over the neat characters.

_…Sanzo's skin smells of cordite and incense. I nip at it and nuzzle into the crease where his thigh meets his groin…_

Gojyo caught his breath.

Holy fucking shit.

His mouth went dry as he started to read.

 

********

He finished an hour later.

Stunned, Gojyo dropped the pages onto the kitchen table. He stared at them as they cascaded across the stained and cigarette-burned surface.

Shit. Had he ever really known Hakkai? If this shit was true, apparently not. Hell, even if it wasn't true. Gojyo felt his anger curl and harden like a stone in his stomach.

Hakkai wore masks, yeah. But not around him.

Except – he did. Obviously. Because there was no way that the Hakkai Gojyo knew was the Hakkai that wrote all this.

The goddamned fucking bastard.

*****

Gojyo was down to his last two cigarettes by the time Hakkai walked into the house carrying the laundry bags.

"Could you help me unload Jeep, please?" Hakkai asked. "I thought you said you'd sweep the porch, too." He laid the laundry bags neatly on Gojyo's futon. "And didn't I ask you to empty the ashtray earlier today?"

"I did. It got filled again." Gojyo drew on his cigarette until the cherry fairly glowed with anger. "Fuck all that shit. Want to explain this?" He waved at the papers.

Hakkai, frowning, picked up a sheet. He started reading and made a small noise while the color drained from his face. "Where did you get this?"

"Where do you think?"

"You looked through my things." Hakkai stared at him.

"I didn't go through your fucking things. I went to take a nap and this was under the damned pillow." Gojyo viciously crushed out his cigarette. "Did you really do all those things? Is that some sort of fucking diary?"

"Of course not!" The color poured back into Hakkai's face. "It's simply erotic writings."

That's what he'd figured. Fuck. In a way it just made things worse. Gojyo glared. "That isn't fucking 'erotic writings.' It's porn! Way over the top, hell-I-didn't-even-know-half-of-this-shit-existed, professional level, twisted _connoisseur_ porn!"

Anger settled over Hakkai's face, giving it a mulish cast. "The stories are for me. They're not any of your business."

"Don't give me that bullshit! If you didn't want me to find them, I could've moved Heaven and Hell and they'd still have stayed hid. You wouldn't just shove a few pages under a pillow and leave the rest in your nightstand."

"Perhaps I thought that they were safe where they were," Hakkai said, his tone biting.

Gojyo wasn't about to let him get the upper hand. "More bullshit. Hell, Hakkai, _Goku_ could have found them if I hadn't. _Sanzo_ could have found them!"

"I hope that you're not insinuating that Sanzo and Goku make it a regular habit to sleep in my bed."

"Don't even go there. We've got something more important to talk about."

"More important than your invasion of my privacy?"

"Damned straight." Gojyo grabbed up a handful of paper. "Where am I?"

Hakkai blinked. "What?"

"You heard me. Where am I?"

"What do you mean?"

Gojyo scraped his chair back and stood. He put his hands flat on the table, glaring at Hakkai. "As far as I can tell, you wrote porn about every fucking person you've ever met. But I'm not in there. Not once. Like I don't even exist or something."

Hakkai collapsed onto the futon next to the bags of clothes. "Gojyo, please help me to understand," he said, looking astonished. "You're upset because, upon reading my private papers—"

"—your sex diary—"

"—my journal of sexual _fantasies_," Hakkai both conceded and corrected, "you're upset because you didn't feature in any of them?"

"Damned right."

Hakkai seemed to be confused. "Why?"

"What? What do you mean, 'why'? It's obvious!"

"Forgive me, but it isn't."

"Of course it is. Because I'm sexy. Because I'm your best friend. Because _everybody else_ is in there!"

"I'd hardly say 'everybody',"

"Hakkai, the fucking _pizza delivery boy_ is in there!"

Hakkai silently regarded Gojyo, confusion replaced by a guarded look. "Yes, well, he's quite good looking, isn't he?"

"And I'm not?"

"There could be any number of reasons why I didn't write about you," Hakkai replied evasively. He opened a laundry bag and began sorting clothes into neat piles.

"Like what?"

Gojyo's ratty old underwear seemed to badly need refolding, the way Hakkai carefully smoothed the cloth. "Well, perhaps I'm not attracted to redheads."

"Then explain why you were fucking Kougaiji in the fourway with him and Doku and Yaone."

"Yes, well, there's that." Hakkai shrugged minutely. "Perhaps you're simply too heterosexual."

"Huh. So you never thought once about me when you wrote about watching that bastard Ukoku Sanzo pound into that Gyukumen Koushou bitch?"

Hakkai laid one of Gojyo's singlets on a pile. "No, I didn't. I don't know what to tell you, Gojyo. Perhaps I'm not interested in you because I know you too well."

"Bullshit. What about Sanzo in a collar and leash and Goku's prick-that-never-wilts?"

Hakkai closed his eyes, his mouth twisting into a lewd smile. "Mmm."

Gojyo nearly exploded with the urge to kick Hakkai in the balls for thinking whatever it was that he was thinking about Sanzo and the monkey without Gojyo in it. "Answer my question, damn it!"

Hakkai opened his eyes and regarded Gojyo coolly. "I'm sorry. You were saying?"

"Chin Ysou and his anatomically correct puppets, Hazel doing a strip tease for you, Gat giving you a prostate massage, the Merciful Goddess pulling prayer beads out of your ass while you jerk off – any of those ring a bell? Plus loads of people I don't even know. But not me. Not once."

"I'm afraid not." Hakkai sighed. "Perhaps it's simply that you're actually _not_ very sexy, Gojyo."

He couldn't have heard right. "Not sexy?"

Hakkai picked up a pile of clothing and went into his bedroom. "Well, there's no accounting for taste."

Gojyo stalked after him. "It doesn't sound like you HAVE any taste!"

"There's no need to get insulting. Or loud." Hakkai opened a dresser drawer and began putting the laundry away.

Gojyo had never wanted to punch someone out as badly as he wanted to break Hakkai's fucking nose at the moment. "Not sexy? What the fuck do you mean, not sexy? The 150-year-old laundromat lady is sexy and I'm not?"

Hakkai closed the dresser drawer with a sharp _thunk_ and turned to face Gojyo. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"Shit." Hakkai was obviously a fucking horny dog for everyone he met. Except for Gojyo. Not that Gojyo wanted Hakkai to be horny for him, but hell. Wasn't he good enough?

Obviously not. The fucking story of his fucking life.

Hakkai laid a hand on his shoulder. "Gojyo. I'm truly sorry. If I had ever thought that you'd be this upset—"

Gojyo shrugged the hand away. "No pity fucks, all right? Even if they're a fucking fantasy."

Hakkai's hand dropped to his side as he looked thoughtfully at Gojyo for a moment. Suddenly he crossed his arms and leaned against the dresser. "I suppose you could try to convince me."

"What?"

"Convince me. That you're—" Hakkai's gaze skimmed Gojyo's body, "—desirable."

"You want me to make you a pity-_seducee?_"

"I wouldn't call it that, exactly."

Fuck. Was he really that pathetic? "Forget it. Just… fuck. No seduction. No fucks, no fantasies, no stories." He was going to go out, he was going to get drunk, and then he was going to fuck or fight his way through every goddamned person in the bar. He turned away and headed for the door.

Hakkai followed him. "Well, how about if _I_ seduce _you_?"

"You said I'm not sexy." Gojyo grabbed his jacket and his almost-empty pack of cigarettes.

"Your hair is very pretty."

"It reminds you of blood."

"Your eyes have always intrigued me."

Gojyo whirled, glaring. "They remind you of blood, too."

"Ah haha. Let me see. What about you doesn't remind me of blood?"

Gojyo felt like he'd been sucker-punched. "You bastard. Fuck. See you later."

"Gojyo."

He paused in the open door, but refused to turn around or answer.

"We need to talk. Please." Hakkai sounded resigned.

"There's nothing to talk about. I'm the one who messed up," Gojyo said bitterly. "I read your fucking diary."

"You were right before. The privacy issue isn't what's important—"

"Just drop it, okay?" Gojyo interrupted. "Hell, we're both guys. It's not like anything would ever even happen. It's just me being stupid." He squared his shoulders. "I'm gonna go out and play some cards. We're getting low on cash."

"We'll talk more when you get back," Hakkai replied.

"No, we won't." Gojyo finally turned to look at him. "It's just a bunch of fucking dirty stories. Just forget it. Sorry about the privacy thing. It won't happen again." He shrugged as if it was nothing, but knew he wasn't fooling Hakkai. "Later."

For once, Hakkai let him get away without needing to have the last word.

*****

Goyjo hated living with a Hakkai who looked at him reproachfully every time their eyes met. He did his best to forget the stupid stories and Hakkai's fucking disinterest in him. Hell, it was just sex fantasies. If he didn't rock Hakkai's boat… His mind shied away from a jumble of disturbingly hot images. And on top of it, he couldn't seem to get away from Hakkai, no matter how hard he tried. Hakkai's list of busy work had grown, becoming increasingly stupid in Gojyo's opinion, until he felt like snarling every time Hakkai opened his mouth.

Like now. Gojyo balanced precariously on the counter, reaching into the furthest recesses of the topmost kitchen cupboard. Another fucking project, but it kept Hakkai off his back. His outstretched fingers brushed against something in the far corner of the cupboard and he pulled out a chipped coffee mug.

Damn. He'd forgotten about this cup. Banri's name was scratched in the glaze. A smile quirked the corner of his mouth as he handed it down to Hakkai.

Hakkai looked at it, his face unreadable, before dropping it into the trash.

"Hey, we could use that," Gojyo protested. He'd always coveted that cup – it held more coffee than any of the others did.

"We'll buy a new one," Hakkai said.

"Why waste money when it's a perfectly good cup—" A change in the quality of Hakkai's silence stopped him. "What?"

"I'll find a job," Hakkai said quietly.

Gojyo rolled his eyes. "Look, the money comment was stupid." He frowned at the trash bin. "But I like that cup."

"You liked the person who used that cup," Hakkai said, his voice neutral.

"Yeah. Banri was okay," Gojyo said defensively. He groped some more, but it appeared that the cupboard was empty. He motioned for the washrag and Hakkai handed it up to him. "I was never stupid enough to trust him, you know," he added sullenly, wiping the shelf.

"He nearly got you killed."

"No. My own stupidity nearly got me killed."

"He betrayed you," Hakkai said fiercely. "His type always betrays people."

"'His type'? What? Punks? I'm still a fucking punk, you know."

"Don't be ridiculous. And I beg to differ. I don't think of you like that."

Not punks then. There was only one other answer. "You mean youkai, don't you?"

"What?"

Gojyo dropped the washrag into the sink and jumped off the counter. Hakkai was right there, too damned close, so he turned to the kitchen table to grab a cigarette that he didn't really want, his stomach tight with bitterness. "It just hit me. It's like in the damned stories you wrote. You fucked the youkai, every time. Never let one of them touch you."

"Those were fantasies—"

"Fantasies can have truth in 'em, too," Gojyo retorted. "Look at you. No more Minus Wave, no more Gyumaoh, but you're still wearing your fucking limiters because you hate to see what you'd look like in the mirror. Well, I _do_ look at myself in the mirror every day, and I don't hate me, got it?"

"I never said I hated you—"

"I'm the closest person you know other than yourself who's youkai, and when it counts, you can't stand to think of me, even in a fantasy."

"You're blowing this all out of proportion!"

"Aw, hell." Gojyo stormed to the door and picked up his coat. "I'm going out."

"I want you to look at me."

"Why?"

"Look at me, Gojyo." Something pattered on the floor.

Gojyo turned and looked. And blinked.

Shit. Hakkai had taken off the fucking limiters.

"I'm ashamed of myself, not you, Gojyo," he snarled. "I think it's presumptuous for you to judge me like that." Hakkai stalked towards him.

Shit. "Sorry-I'm-goin'-for-a-walk," Gojyo said quickly, just before he turned and sprinted out the door.

He would have got away, except that the fucking broom that he'd forgotten to put away tangled with his ankles and he came down hard in a crash of wood and scraped knees.

Something slithered around his wrists and legs. "Fuck!" he wheezed. He struggled, but it was no good. He heard footsteps behind him, then clawed fingers scratched gently through his hair as Hakkai knelt next to him.

"You've never run from me before."

"Yeah, well," Gojyo coughed. "You've never pulled the damned 'scary youkai' act before."

"I'm sorry about that. But I didn't want you to go." Hakkai really did look contrite, in a sharp-toothed kind of way. "Gojyo, I truly do find you desirable." He leaned forward. "I like the way you smell."

"Shit!" Gojyo pulled away as far as he could, but was embarrassed as hell when his cock twitched at Hakkai's words. Goddamn. "Look, it's no big deal, okay? Just let me go and let's forget it."

Hakkai leaned back. "You were upset that I didn't write about you, but now you want to run away when I say I find you attractive." Gojyo's cock twitched again, the perverted brainless bastard. "I'm confused. Don't you want that?"

Gojyo opened his mouth to say, 'hell no, I don't want that,' but what actually came out was, "I didn't say that."

"But I didn't say 'yes' either," he added hastily, horrified at himself. He squirmed around until he could finally get a look at whatever was tying him and winced. Yeah, it was Hakkai's vines. He dropped his head and waited for Hakkai to chew him out. Or maybe chew him up, he wasn't really sure. "Look, I thought you hated being youkai."

"Now who's changing the subject?"

_Because I'm getting a hard-on for you, jerk!_ "I'm straight!"

"I'm… not. Entirely. Call me curious."

"Call me the damned police," Gojyo muttered under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing." He looked away. "Stop hating yourself. It's fine that you're youkai, all right?"

"Gojyo."

He sighed and remained silent.

"Is this really about my fantasy diary or being youkai?" The rumbling voice was gentle.

"What do you think?"

"I think that now that the journey is over, you don't know what to do with yourself," Hakkai said, surprisingly candid.

Gojyo fumed. More fucking tangents. The problem wasn't with him, it was with Hakkai. "So what? I'm bored." It felt stupid and petty when said out loud, but Gojyo figured that was because it was a stupid and petty reason to begin with. He shifted uneasily, his erection rapidly fading.

Hakkai studied him. "Perhaps a regular job..."

"If it was that easy, don't you think I'd have already found something to do?" Gojyo's frustrations bled like a wound. "I know what you've been doing, and I appreciate it, okay? Building the porch, hanging the corkboard, the daily chores, trying to keep me occupied – I get it. Stop trying so hard. It's my life."

Hakkai sighed. "I just want to help."

"Whatever." Gojyo was pissed. The fucking condescending bastard. "Let me go."

"If I do, what do you plan to do?"

"I don't know. But that makes fuck-all difference. Let me go."

The vines reluctantly released him and returned to Hakkai. "I'm sorry." He rubbed the back of his head and laughed. "Ah ha ha. I never thought my stories would cause so much trouble."

Hakkai's apology made Gojyo feel stupid. "They're good you know," he said gruffly, sitting up and rubbing his wrists. "Really hot."

"Ah ha ha." If anything, this laugh sounded even more false. "They're just stories."

"Just stories," Gojyo echoed bitterly.

Hakkai paused and looked at Gojyo. His expression was resigned, and more than a little sad. "Would you prefer if I left the cuffs off?"

"Me?" Gojyo hadn't seen it that way at all, but he didn't want to entirely lose the opportunity for Hakkai to maybe stop hating himself so much. "This is about you, isn't it?"

"Is it?" Hakkai sighed. "Gojyo, you know how I hate—"

"—youkai," Gojyo finished for him. "Fine. Put the limiters back on. I'll keep acting human, if that's what you want."

"Gojyo--"

"Leave it." Gojyo shrugged, frustrated and unhappy. "It's okay. Things are okay." He picked up the broom and started to sweep, ignoring Hakkai's considering gaze.

Eventually the door closed.

Gojyo kept sweeping.

*****

Gojyo leaned on his shovel and wiped the sweat from his brow. He'd taken off his shirt and tied up his hair, but the workout he was getting from transplanting all of the eggplant seedlings felt…

…Well, not good. But numbing, at least. He had no idea how they were going to eat all of the eggplants later that summer, though. Or the peppers or squash or cucumbers, either. But if Hakkai wanted a garden, Gojyo would plant. He glanced back at the house to see Hakkai walking towards him carrying a glass.

After their argument, Hakkai had left the limiters off. The problem was, seeing Hakkai in his youkai form every day, all day long, was doing weird things to Gojyo's stomach.

"Would you like some water, Gojyo?"

"A beer would be better." The joke fell flat and they stood looking at the ground. Gojyo accepted the glass from Hakkai. "Thanks."

Hakkai looked over the garden plot. "You've really worked hard."

"Yeah, well," Gojyo said, "plenty to do around here, isn't there?"

"You're not bored by all of it?"

_Hell, yeah, I'm bored. But it's better than staring at the clouds, or worse, trying not to stare at you._ Gojyo shrugged. "I'm keeping busy."

"Yes." Hakkai was now looking at him the same way he'd looked at the garden. "Gojyo, about last week--"

"I said it was _okay._" Gojyo lowered his voice with an effort. "Sorry. Look, water under the bridge. Hey, what do you think about a row of beans over there? I could put up some poles and wires and stuff for them to grow on."

"Trellises." Hakkai didn't look at the area Gojyo was pointing to. "We need to talk."

"Why?"

"We can't keep on like this. It's not natural, Gojyo. You're up before I am every morning, you've cleaned up around your futon before I even finish breakfast, you work on projects all day. I don't think you've smoked a cigarette indoors since we—"

"No worries, you were right. I'm turning over a new leaf," Gojyo said quickly. He drained the glass and handed it to Hakkai. "I'll get the rest of these planted before they wilt, then start on the trellis. I'll probably go out to the pub tonight, so don't worry about dinner. I can pick something up there."

"Gojyo."

Gojyo buried the shovel's blade deep in the earth. "It'll be okay."

He kept digging as Hakkai walked away.

*****

Gojyo pulled the pile of money towards him and grinned. "Sorry, boys. Sha Gojyo's hot tonight." The three women hanging over his chair laughed.

"Sha Gojyo better watch his fuckin' back," muttered one of the players, but he didn't sound like he was going to jump over the table at him, so Gojyo just grinned.

"Gojyo's the best player in town. And the sexiest." The raven-haired beauty who had been leaning on Gojyo's shoulder for the past half hour slipped into his lap. He couldn't remember her name. Not that it mattered. They both knew what they were doing. He kissed her, enjoying the wicked slip of her tongue against his.

"It's warm in here, sweetheart," he said, rubbing his hand over her ass. "Wanna take a walk with me?"

"Mmm," she purred. "I have a better idea. I have some wine I was saving for a special occasion. Why don't you come over and we'll open it?"

"And what would the occasion be?" Gojyo murmured back. He nuzzled her neck.

"I'm sure we'll think of something."

Gojyo laughed. She slid off his lap and pulled on his hand. He stood willingly, following her as she wove through the crowded pub towards the door.

Outside, he tugged her hand. "C'mere," he said, tilting his head towards the alley next to the pub.

She giggled and followed him into the darkness. Gojyo grinned to himself: she seemed the type to like the whole public sex thing. He pulled her into an alcove and slid his hand up her thigh, kissing and caressing her until she moaned into his mouth and spread her legs apart a bit. Smiling into the kiss, Gojyo slipped his hand under her panties and fingered her. She was already slippery as hell, and a moment later her hands were busy with his jeans and his cock was stiffening in the cool evening air.

"I want it hard, against the wall," she whispered.

"Kinky," Gojyo whispered back. He pushed his fingers in deeper and thumbed her clit.

She moaned again and lifted one leg to wrap it around his waist. He pulled his fingers out of her and grabbed her ass, lifting her up and bracing her against the wall as he entered her. She clung to his neck and wrapped her other leg around him, and Gojyo started thrusting hard and deep.

He loved the sounds she made as his cock slid in and out. "Touch yourself, baby," he whispered into her ear. "I can't play with your clit while I'm holding you like this."

She slipped a hand between them and Gojyo could feel her fingers brushing his cock as she rubbed and pinched her sensitive nub. Her pussy muscles clutched him tighter.

"Oh, God," she breathed.

"How ya comin'?"

"Nearly there. Fuck me harder."

Gojyo snapped his hips harder and she threw her head back against the building. "Oh God," she repeated and went still, clutching him tight. He thrust in a couple more times and then stiffened in turn, her pussy muscles still milking him.

They panted together a moment.

"I've gotta let you down now," Gojyo said. He pulled out of her carefully; she lowered her legs. He held her up, whispering nonsense until she was able to stand on her own.

Someone started yelling in the street beyond the alley. Gojyo inched them further into the shadows, but nobody came after them.

"What's all the yelling about?" She pulled down her skirt.

"Doesn't look like it's anything to do with us." He caught a whiff of smoke. "Wait. Something's burning."

"That's just us, baby," she replied.

Gojyo hummed in appreciation, feeling his prick already taking new interest. But the smell was getting stronger. "We'd better get out there."

"Still up for some wine?" she asked as she nestled into the crook of Gojyo's arm and they walked towards the street.

"Sure, sweet—" They stepped onto the street and into chaos.

"The temple! The temple's on fire!" a man shouted as he ran past them.

Gojyo looked up the hill and swore. The lower levels of the Temple of Chang'an were blazing. _ Sanzo and Goku—_

"Sorry, baby, I've gotta go," he said, sprinting away before he could hear her reply.

He couldn't look away from the inferno. Flames leapt like a devil's laugh towards the pale arc of moon visible in the clear spring night. A bucket brigade seemed to be forming, which Gojyo figured would probably have as much effect on the fire as pissing on it would. It looked like it would be more a matter of not letting the flames spread into the town than it was of saving the temple.

When Gojyo reached the temple steps, he paused. The part of the temple where Sanzo lived was engulfed. He could hear screams behind the flames, and there was a sickening smell of roasting meat. The fire had obviously claimed someone or something already. Cursing, he pulled his bandana from around his forehead and tied it over his nose and mouth.

"You can't go in there!" a man cried, grabbing his arm.

Gojyo examined what looked like a flame-free corridor that hugged the interior of the outer walls. "Get the bucket brigades to try to keep the fire away from that area," he shouted above the flames. "I'll bring out anyone I find, but you've got to keep it open." He dashed forward without waiting for a reply.

Though the corridor was free of flames, the heat swirled around him, thick and cloying. Instinctively, Gojyo summoned his shakujou and sliced through the air, the blades mirroring the dancing flames until it looked like they were burning, too.

The fire's roar was deafening, but he heard a shrill scream slicing through the noise. _Not Sanzo,_ his mind told him. _ Not Goku, either._ A doorway yawned in front of him and he paused and looked inside.

Through the flames he could see a novice crouched, hands over his head and sobbing between screams. "Oi!" Gojyo shouted. "Come on. Run for it!"

"I'll get burned!" the boy screamed.

"Fuck," Gojyo muttered. He raised his voice. "Right. I'm coming for you." He ran his tongue over dry lips, took a deep breath, and leapt.

There was an instant of heat against his unprotected skin, the smell of scorched hair and cloth, then he was on the other side, brushing sparks off his clothing and cursing in a steady stream. "C'mon, kid."

The boy didn't move. Gojyo swore again and grabbed him, then turned back to face the flames.

Shit. He'd just jumped through the bastards. How come they looked so damned much bigger from this side? He took a deep breath. "Hang on!"

He leapt through again, the kid screaming and thrashing against him. Once past the flames, he dropped the brat to the ground. "Get up and run!" he shouted, and the kid did, pelting down the path and disappearing from view within seconds, hidden by the billowing smoke.

Gojyo grabbed his shakujou and climbed higher.

By the time he'd reached the corridor that led to Sanzo's chambers, he'd sent three other monks scrambling down the escape route. No one had seen Sanzo or Goku.

When he reached the top of the stairs, Gojyo finally conceded to himself that if Sanzo or Goku had been trapped there, it was much, much too late to save them.

The fire continued to roar, but here in its heart there were other sounds, like voices from hell singing and cursing and spitting. The stone around him glowed red. Gojyo jumped as one great slab cracked with a noise like a cannon, split by the heat. He hesitated, torn between going forward and going back, when the wall behind him collapsed.

He whirled, cursing, as the flames between him and the corridor leading down to the village leapt high. Fuck.

He'd run out of time.

The whole ridiculous mess of his life swirled in his mind like the flames swirled in his gaze, taunting him with his weakness, his worthlessness, his utter lack of anything to show for the twenty-odd years he'd lived except a cursed shakujou and scars on his cheek. He was glad he'd fucked the nameless girl. In a way, he'd _nearly_ died in bed, which was pretty damned good given the last few years.

_But it wasn't Hakkai._

Gojyo froze. Shit.

_It wasn't Hakkai._

"Way to go, asshole," he muttered, full of self-loathing. "Have an identity crisis right before you die."

No way forward. No way back.

Gojyo growled, held his shakujou in a firm grip, and ran at the flames.

*****

Fuck. Must have been one hell of a party.

Gojyo tried to open his eyes, but they were gummed shut. He heard a rustle and crackle.

Memories flooded his mind of flames and heat and a fire that sounded like it was laughing as he fell… But there was no heat. More crackling, but this time it sounded familiar. "Hakkai?"

"You have to be the stupidest fuck alive."

Gojyo's eyelids finally came unstuck and he squinted at the person sitting in the chair beside him. "Sanzo?"

Sanzo grunted and lifted his newspaper again. Gojyo could see a picture of the temple burning on the front page. "Are we dead?" he asked.

The newspaper seemed to freeze in place for a moment before Sanzo rolled it up, his eyes blazing. Without warning, he cursed and brought it down on Gojyo's head.

"Ouch! You shitty monk!" Gojyo rubbed the bruise. "What the fuck did you do that—?"

"Shut up." Sanzo glared at him. "You're not dead, asshole."

"I'm not? But you and Goku—"

"We weren't there," Sanzo said shortly.

"Oh." Gojyo remembered the smell. "How many?"

"Two. Probably the idiots who started it." Sanzo looked grim. "Now shut up."

Gojyo looked around, and realized that he was in Hakkai's room. "Where's Hakkai?" He cautiously tried to sit up, and was able to manage it. Damned weak, though.

"Asleep on the futon." Sanzo unrolled the paper.

"I can move there," Gojyo said. "Let him have his bed back."

Sanzo glared at him. "Leave him alone."

"What the hell's up with you?" Gojyo demanded.

"You're no fucking hero!"

"I never said I was!"

Sanzo grunted and looked away, glaring at the book on the bedside table. "Were you the one with the bright idea about Hakkai's limiters?"

"He was the one that offered to leave 'em off," Gojyo said defensively. "What about it?"

"I doubt the villagers are ever going to trust him again."

"Shit. Look, he and I… It's gonna be okay, okay? And it's none of your fucking business, anyway," Gojyo muttered.

"It is when I've had to drag his half-dead corpse off yours," Sanzo said, teeth clenched.

Gojyo's heart stumbled. "What?"

Sanzo looked at him. "It was nearly three."

"Shit. That stupid fucking shit." He felt limp and wrung out. Hakkai. That stupid, stupid bastard. "Why the hell didn't you stop him?" Sanzo glared, his expression saying 'nobody can stop Hakkai, asshole,' better than any words. Gojyo figured he had a point. "Did he come after me?"

"No. You decided to die on this side of the fire line. A couple of men dragged your sorry ass out."

Gojyo could imagine what Hakkai must have seen, the hellhole blast of the heat, the smell of charred flesh and burnt hair, the roar of the taunting flames. "Was I dead?"

Sanzo grunted again. "Pretty much. Being in his youkai form probably saved both of your lives," he admitted grudgingly. "He used up most of his qi."

"The stupid bastard."

"Not as stupid as you." Sanzo stood and tucked the newspaper away. "Die next time, will you? I'm sick of seeing your guilty face." He stalked out of the room. A moment later Gojyo heard the front door slam.

"Fuck," Gojyo whispered. Truth was, he was pretty sick of his guilty face, too. After a couple of tries, Gojyo managed to get out of bed, stifling his curses.

Stumbling out of the bedroom, he paused. Hakkai lay unmoving on the futon, one of Gojyo's blankets thrown over him. Gojyo muttered another curse and headed for the bathroom.

After he pissed, he looked in the mirror.

"Shit," he muttered. He looked like fucking Banri. His eyebrows were gone, and so was most of his hair. His skin looked red, but more like a bad sunburn than a fire burn. He took a deep breath, but there was no catch in his lungs, not even a cough after all the smoke he'd inhaled.

What had he looked like when Hakkai had found him? Remembering corpses scattered at Houtou Castle, he shuddered and leaned on the sink.

_Like my looks, do you, Hakkai?_

Gojyo switched off the light and paused in the bathroom door to look at Hakkai again. Then, shaking his head, he made his way slowly to the futon, slipped under the blanket, and pulled Hakkai close.

He fell asleep almost immediately.

*****

Gojyo woke alone, but he could hear someone moving around in the kitchen.

Shit, he was sore. He pushed himself to a sitting position and leaned against the wall. Hakkai was in the kitchen, his back towards Gojyo.

"Are there any aspirin around?"

Wordlessly, Hakkai turned on the tap and came over a moment later with a glass of water and several aspirin tablets.

"Thank you," Gojyo said, popping the pills into his mouth and drinking. Water had never tasted quite so sweet. When he'd finished the glass, Hakkai took it back from him. "Uh," Gojyo said, uncomfortable under Hakkai's unwavering gaze, "thanks for saving my life and everything."

Hakkai glanced at his hair and his lips thinned. "You're welcome."

"It'll come back," Gojyo said. "It grows fast." He tried to grin, but it fell flat under Hakkai's frown. Gojyo picked at a thread on his sweat pants. "I guess you want me to say I'm sorry, too."

"I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do," Hakkai replied. "Do you want me to leave?"

"Nah," Gojyo said. "I don't need privacy or quiet or anything. I'm sore, but I feel okay."

"I don't mean now." Hakkai looked at him steadily. "I meant, do you want me to move out?"

"What? No! What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I lied to you." Hakkai's mismatched eyes were steady. "I wrote those fantasies because I wanted you and couldn't have you."

"You wanted me?" Gojyo's jaw dropped.

"You don't want me, which is more the issue here."

"Wait a fucking second!" Gojyo protested. "It's not that. You just don't want me the right way!"

"What do you mean?"

Gojyo paused. Fuck. "I don't think I can be human enough for you."

"You're not human!"

"Way to rub it in," Gojyo muttered. "I don't want to mess things up. 'S that better?"

"That hardly seems fair," Hakkai said bitterly.

"What?" Gojyo blinked.

"You're not attracted to men. You've told me that for years. Even last night, while I was working on you, I could smell a woman on your body." Hakkai slammed the glass on the kitchen table. "I've known that if we entered a sexual relationship it would be unequal, that I'd have to compete for your attention."

Gojyo shifted uncomfortably. "Maybe."

Hakkai looked disgusted. "You'd never take a relationship with me seriously."

"Wait a second! Haven't I taken it seriously for the past six years?" Gojyo asked incredulously. "I've never ditched you, not once. Well, okay, once when I went after that Kami-bastard, but I apologized and everything, even before I took off."

"You're loyal that way—"

"No. I'm not. And stop looking at me like that," he added at Hakkai's skeptical expression. "I never stick around. Never. But I did for you."

"And why was that?"

"Hell, I don't know! Why the fuck does anyone ever stick around?"

Hakkai took a deep breath and clenched his fists, turning away.

"Oh, fuck!" Gojyo said desperately. "Okay! It's because you're fucking crazy and you need someone to look after you! You laughed when I asked if you were dead. You made fun of Hell went you woke up."

"Gojyo." His youkai voice, deep, rough, tumbled over Gojyo's skin like stones in a rushing stream. He whirled and approached the futon. "I'm not the one who needs to be taken care of."

Every instinct in Gojyo's body was telling him to run. Instead, heart pounding, he asked, "Any ground rules?"

Hakkai reached the futon and fell gracefully to his knees. "Are you frightened?"

"Shit, yes." Gojyo couldn't breathe.

Hakkai smiled a small, wicked smile. "I want to fuck you, Gojyo."

Gojyo closed his eyes and groaned. _Bad move,_ he instantly realized, and opened his eyes as Hakkai struck. He went down before he could even put up a token defense, pinned out-stretched by Hakkai's crazy-ass youkai strength.

Hakkai dragged his tongue up Gojyo's throat, his incisors scraping lightly over his jugular before he bit Gojyo just beneath the ear. Gojyo hissed as the fangs broke skin, holding as still as he could. He felt a small trickle of blood flow down his neck. "Hakkai, I'm about to shit my pants, here."

Hakkai released him. "Say it, Gojyo."

"You've marked me, isn't that enough?"

"It's not permanent."

"Permanent," Gojyo echoed.

Hakkai waited, his eyes wary.

Permanent. Permanent meant he belonged to someone, something that he'd pretty much convinced himself that he never wanted.

Hakkai pressed against him, so close that Gojyo could feel his heartbeat. His breath ghosted warm over Gojyo's face, smelling of cinnamon and mint, while underneath that was the smell of arousal and the weight of Hakkai's erection pressing against his hip.

Permanent.

"Shit," Gojyo said. "I do."

Hakkai frowned. "You do what?"

"You said permanent. This is our fucking wedding, isn't it? I do."

The pupil in Hakkai's good eye dilated until it was almost black. "You're mine?"

"I'm yours." He glared at Hakkai "And if you ever screw me over, I'll fucking kill you."

A smile played across Hakkai's face. "If you're ever unfaithful to me, I'll kill her."

"I wish I thought you were joking," Gojyo muttered, "but it doesn't matter. Not gonna happen. Now, are you going to fuck me or what?"

Hakkai abruptly sat up and drew his razor-sharp claw down the leg of Gojyo's sweatpants, parting the cotton like butter. He did the same down the other leg and peeled the cloth away from Gojyo's body, leaving him bare and exposed and hopelessly hard under Hakkai's gaze, his prick straining for contact. Hakkai gripped Gojyo's thighs and pulled him into his lap with a smooth yank. Gojyo shivered at the feel of Hakkai's cloth-covered cock pressed against his naked ass, nudging him just behind his balls.

"I wanna kiss you," Gojyo whispered.

Another fluid motion, and Gojyo found himself upright and held close, Hakkai's hand cradling his head. He buried his hands in Hakkai's hair and groaned as Hakkai claimed his mouth. Hakkai squeezed his ass; Gojyo surged deeper into the kiss, unable to stifle a moan.

Hakkai drew back, mouth red and wet, and leaned his forehead against Gojyo's. "If you want to prepare yourself, you'd better do it now."

"Lubricant. In the chest," Gojyo said, shivering. Hakkai opened the small chest that Gojyo kept his clothes in and pulled out handfuls of fabric, snagging and tearing the cloth until a well-used tube of slick dropped out. He gave it to Gojyo, who popped the cover off and squeezed some out.

"Has anyone else ever taken you?" Hakkai asked, dragging his fangs over Gojyo's ear.

Gojyo shivered and pressed closer to Hakkai's mouth. "Just call me 'Cherry-chan.'" He bit his lip as he reached back with slick fingers, feeling awkward and exposed. Figuring it was better to get the initial pain out of the way, he pushed two in as far as they'd go, wincing at the burn.

"More," Hakkai breathed, unzipping his trousers. He ran a claw down the front of his own shirt, popping the buttons off and shrugging it from his shoulders. "Fuck yourself for me, Gojyo." His cock tented his pants as he rubbed it against Gojyo's groin.

Gojyo rocked his ass on his fingers, the burn lessening. "Oh yeah," he breathed, closing his eyes. "Shit. Feels sorta good now."

"Sit up," Hakkai commanded. Gojyo slipped his fingers out and rearranged himself so that he could raise his ass off of Hakkai's lap long enough for Hakkai to shed the rest of his clothing.

"You're fucking gorgeous," Gojyo whispered, staring at the elegant swirl of vines that enveloped Hakkai's body. "Damn," he added, getting his first glimpse of Hakkai's erection.

Hakkai's cock was a decent length, though not as long as Gojyo's. But damn, it was thick. Hell, it was thicker than any he'd ever seen, even in porn movies. Vines wound its length; they seemed to follow the largest veins, deceptively delicate against the angry flush of the shaft. Gojyo closed his fist around it.

Shit. His fingers just met.

Hakkai grunted, his hips jerking forward. "Turn around, Gojyo," he said.

Gojyo shivered again. That cock was going inside him. Two fingers seemed like a pencil or something in comparison. Slowly, he turned his back towards Hakkai.

Hakkai pushed him forward, guiding him with a hand on his neck until Gojyo was on his hands and knees, then pushing him further down until Gojyo had to turn his face to avoid being smothered in the pillow, his ass high in the air.

"Stay."

Gojyo obeyed, breathing fast. Damn. Fuck. Damn. Hakkai was going to fuck him. He felt Hakkai's hands on his ass, pulling his cheeks apart, the tips of his claws pricking Gojyo's skin. Something large nudged at his entrance, then pushed harder. Gojyo stifled a moan and clenched his teeth as Hakkai sank into him.

It hurt like a sonofabitch. Gojyo felt his own erection wilt.

Hakkai groaned. "Gojyo—"

Gojyo grunted in reply, pretty sure he was about to be split in half. Hakkai withdrew a bit and quickly snapped his hips forward, surprising a yelp out of Gojyo, which Hakkai ignored as he began to pump in earnest. Gojyo swore under his breath as Hakkai pushed deeper into him until he was draped over Gojyo, pressed tight to his back. Gojyo braced himself and spread his legs wider.

Hakkai began to fuck Gojyo, interlacing their fingers and pinning him in place as he drove into Gojyo's ass in a steady rhythm. Gojyo bit his lip, more intent on holding the position and enduring than he was on figuring out some way to actually enjoy being fucked. Yet even with the pain and discomfort, he liked having Hakkai's weigh on him, liked the heat and the smells and the sheer physicality of the act. All of that power, directed at him, the feeling of Hakkai moving inside of him – in some ways, Gojyo felt like he'd never really _experienced_ sex before, that all the rest of the times he'd simply _had_ it.

He felt Hakkai lick the back of his neck and bite down, and arched into it with a grunt. "Go ahead," Gojyo panted. "Give it to me."

Hakkai redoubled his efforts, sinking in to the hilt with each thrust and pulling out until only the head was caught tight by Gojyo's ass muscles, the rhythm repeated over and over. He bit harder, the quick puffs of his breath hot and almost soothing against the sting as his incisors pierced Gojyo's skin. Gojyo's back was wet with sweat, his own and Hakkai's, and the damp slap of skin on skin was mesmerizing. Gojyo surrendered completely, the smells and sounds and weight and pain melding together until he was utterly lost in a haze of sensation.

Fingers unlaced and teeth withdrew. Without a pause in rhythm, Hakkai grasped Gojyo's hip and took Gojyo's cock in his other hand. He paused in mid-stroke. "Gojyo…?"

"It's okay, it's good, keep going," Gojyo said, trying to push his ass down on Hakkai's cock. "Keep fucking me!"

"You're not enjoying this," Hakkai said, sounding confused.

How to explain? "Just because my dick's not hard doesn't mean this isn't the best damned sex I've ever had." Gojyo pushed himself up on his elbows and craned his neck around to look at Hakkai. "C'mon! Don't stop now, you bastard!"

Hakkai shook his head and studied Gojyo, then withdrew completely. Gojyo yelped. "Oh, fucking shit," he hissed, closing his eyes and collapsing on the futon.

Hands pulled at him, flipping him over on his back. Hakkai pulled him onto his lap again and thrust into Gojyo in one fluid motion, surprising another yelp out of Gojyo. Gojyo wrapped his legs around Hakkai's waist and whispered, "oh shit, oh shit, oh shit…" over and over until he re-adjusted to the bulk inside him. Hakkai didn't move, for which Gojyo was profoundly grateful. Finally he relaxed, the renewed pain of penetration subsiding into the now-familiar ache of overstretched muscles.

"Lie back."

"I'm lying," Gojyo said. He tilted his head so he could see Hakkai better. "The leverage isn't as good in this position, you know."

Hakkai snorted before baring his teeth in an unsettling smile. "But it allows me to do this."

He contorted impossibly and Gojyo's prick was engulfed in warm heat. Startled, Gojyo pushed into it, feeling his cock begin to fill and lengthen as Hakkai sucked him. Gojyo jerked again, trying to thrust into the exquisite sensation, and uttered a long, frustrated groan as Hakkai released him.

"Fuck yourself on me," Hakkai whispered, his eye glittering before he plunged down on Gojyo's cock again.

Gojyo scrambled to find the proper leverage, finally managing to brace himself against Hakkai's knees enough to make shallow thrusts that plunged him deeper into Hakkai's mouth, only to be refilled by Hakkai's cock on each downstroke. He pushed harder.

Something twinged deep inside his ass.

"Oh, shit," he gasped, and thrust up again, coming down hard. The twinge became a jolt of carnal pleasure that left him breathless. He redoubled his efforts, mindlessly seeking and finding that sweet spot again and again while Hakkai sucked his cock, sliding his tongue under the foreskin and curling around the glans only to plunge down and press at the sensitive spot just below the head that always sent Gojyo wild.

Gojyo moaned with pleasure. He needed to be closer, needed to feel more than just Hakkai's prick and mouth. He pulled Hakkai's hair. Hakkai let Gojyo's prick fall from his mouth and straightened, his face flushed and red, his lips wet.

"I want to touch you," Gojyo gasped. He slid off and rearranged himself until he was kneeling over Hakkai's lap. Without hesitation he slammed himself back down on Hakkai's cock, hissing but angling his hips to find the electric spot inside. "Suck me again," he said. "C'mon." He pushed Hakkai's head towards his groin.

Hakkai laughed, sounding a bit wild, then contorted again and took Gojyo's cock into his mouth. Gojyo could suddenly move a whole hell of a lot more freely and he ground his ass into Hakkai's lap, fucking himself steadily. He bent over Hakkai, threading his fingers through Hakkai's hair and pressing him down even further, thrusting up into that hot, wet slickness. Hakkai tilted his head a bit so that one of his incisors scraped against Gojyo's prick.

Gojyo stiffened in surprise as he erupted. He curled over Hakkai, his balls convulsing and shooting come deep inside Hakkai's mouth, feeling the contractions of Hakkai's throat as he swallowed the heavy load.

He slumped as the aftershocks of pleasure faded. Hakkai straightened and growled, grabbing Gojyo's face and kissing him furiously. Then Hakkai pushed Gojyo off his lap and backwards onto the futon. "Grab your knees," he ordered hoarsely.

Gojyo pulled his legs back.

If Gojyo thought he'd been fucked before, it was nothing to what Hakkai did to him now. Relaxed and floating, Gojyo experimented with moving the muscles in his ass around Hakkai's plunging cock, just to see if he could make Hakkai go crazier. Hakkai snapped his hips in hard, growling, holding Gojyo's thighs in an iron grip to keep him from moving while Hakkai pounded into him.

"That's it, cowboy," Gojyo murmured. "Ride me, fucker."

Hakkai lunged forward and bit down hard at the intersection of Gojyo's neck and shoulder. Gojyo clutched Hakkai's head to his shoulder, murmuring the dirtiest things he could imagine.

Suddenly, Hakkai stiffened. Gojyo could feel Hakkai's cock pulsing inside him, the release stinging his abraded passage.

Hakkai's mouth slid from Gojyo's neck and he collapsed, his chest heaving. Gojyo wrapped his arms and legs around him and held him close. They lay together like that, intertwined, silent, until Hakkai's softening cock finally slipped out of Gojyo with a wet, sucking sound.

"You can't leave me," Hakkai whispered. "Never leave me, Gojyo."

Gojyo whuffed into Hakkai's throat. "Tell you what. If something happens to me, I'll make the Merciful Goddess's life hell until she sends me back. Good enough?"

"If she doesn't, tell her I'll come and take you back myself, even if I have to tear Heaven apart with my claws."

"Deal."

Hakkai hummed in agreement, gently chewing on Gojyo's collarbone before claiming his mouth.

They kissed lazily, Gojyo savoring the taste of himself on Hakkai's lips. Hakkai cupped Gojyo's face in his hands, holding him still while he dropped small kisses over his face. Gojyo's eyes drifted shut, the better to focus on the butterfly-soft caresses.

"I can heal your skin further, but I'm afraid I can't make your hair grow any faster." Hakkai ran his clawed thumb gently over Gojyo's none-existent eyebrow as Gojyo opened one eye.

"Damn. I can't play poker tonight looking like this," Gojyo said. "They'll all point and laugh."

"I don't care what anyone else thinks about you, unless it's 'he belongs to Hakkai,'" Hakkai murmured against Gojyo's lips. "We need a more stable source of income than your gambling, anyway. Perhaps I'll write erotica for a living. You can help me do my research."

Gojyo smiled at Hakkai, gently rearranging him until his head was nestled on Gojyo's chest. Yeah, they still had some things to work out. "Tell you what. You be a famous porn writer and I'll be your guinea pig. But how about I look into organizing a volunteer fire brigade, too?"

Hakkai froze. "Gojyo…"

"The village needs it," Gojyo said softly, "and I can't keep living like this, Hakkai."

Hakkai was quiet, clearly disturbed. Gojyo sighed. Yeah, they'd need some time to deal with all this. He petted Hakkai's hair, scratching his nails idly against Hakkai's scalp. "Hey, if you're gonna be a big porn writer…" His voice trailed away as he traced the graceful curve of Hakkai's pointed ear.

Hakkai made an unhappy inquiring noise.

"Write something about me."

Hakkai relaxed an infinitesimal bit. "But I've made it through the alphabet," he said.

"You alphabetized your kinks? Twenty-six letters, and not one of them about me?" Gojyo blinked. "Wait. Seriously. You really alphabetized your kinks?"

"They're easier to keep in order that way."

Gojyo snorted and continued to stroke Hakkai's hair. "Fine. Organize 'em by color or the number of pricks involved, I don't care. Just write one about me. Start in on numbers or something."

"Oh. Well…" Hakkai shifted, nuzzling Gojyo's nipple.

"You've done numbers, too?"

"Through one thousand and one, I'm afraid. During our first two years on the road."

Gojyo seriously needed to find that journal. "Any about me?"

Hakkai's voice was apologetic. "No. I'm sorry, Gojyo. Perhaps if I had known…"

"How about seasons? Months? Nursery rhymes?" Gojyo grinned as Hakkai ignored him and began an involved exploration of Gojyo's nipple. "Hell, Hakkai, you don't even know that many people."

"Quite a few people went through the orphanage while I was there, and I _did_ go to university for a semester—"

"Right. Tell you what. Write stories about how you'd have sex with me in every country in the world."

"Oh." Hakkai shifted lower and rubbed his cheek on Gojyo's belly. Gojyo felt the brush of razor stubble. "Actually, I was saving that theme."

"For who?"

"'For _whom_'."

"Who, damn it?"

Hakkai's eyes darted towards Jeep, who was curled up on Hakkai's bed, just visible through the bedroom doorway.

"I don't fucking believe it." Gojyo flung his arm over his eyes, only to have it dragged away and a fierce toothy grin hover over him.

"Ah haha." Hakkai's laugh was quiet, a matter of air, not sound. "You're quite gullible you know, Gojyo."

"You're dead," Gojyo growled. He pulled Hakkai off-balance and rolled over on top of him, pinning him to the bed.

Hakkai smiled up at him. "No, I'm not. And neither are you."

"Smart ass," Gojyo said. "Guess that's good, though, 'cause I can't do this to a dead man." He gathered Hakkai's rapidly-recovering prick in his hand. "Want me to suck you?"

"Yes, please. I've always imagined your mouth on me," Hakkai purred. "Let's see if you're as good in person as you would be if I wrote you."

"Just for that, no orgasm for you," Gojyo retorted. "At least, not until the reviews come in." He squeezed Hakkai's cock.

Hakkai's breath caught and his eyes drifted closed as he rolled his hips towards Gojyo.

Gojyo grinned. Yeah. This was gonna be fun. He dipped his head and stroked his tongue across Hakkai's slit, revelling in the twitch of Hakkai's cock in his palm. A drop of liquid welled into the little depression, looking so good that Gojyo closed his mouth over it and began giving him what he figured would be the blowjob of Hakkai's life.

He'd never really been much on reading anyway.

__

fin.


End file.
